Police Ducks and Pigeon Whores

My friend Gary arrived from Canada to visit a couple of weekends ago. After resting up a bit and feeding him some tea and other delightfully British things (are scrambled eggs delightfully British?) I decided the perfect introduction to England would be to take him for pub roast lunch with my always amusing friends Alan and Lisa.

Poor Gary...by the end of the afternoon he thought that the British police, instead of having dogs, protected the public with Police Ducks and that Trafalgar Square has been rid of its bird problems by Ken Livingston's innovative use of Pigeon Whores.



Keeping London's Parks safe....

The Last 10 minutes on a Friday...

...are the slowest minutes EVER!!!

I can't wait to go home to a night of stupidly funny DVDs and picking my bike up from the bike fix-it shop...

Hooray - Hobbes has just phoned...later everyone!

Jet setting...

I had a fantastic week-and-a-bit off! I took at trip up to Sweden/Norway where Patrik, Gustav, Jonathan and I stayed at the most lovely cabin in the Norwegian mountains!

Among the highlights were:
Being trapped in a car with a bunch of farm yard animals for 8 hours
Eating elk (in both sausage and regular-meat form; and then seeing pictures of it just-post-death and then looking beside me on the sofa and realising I was sitting next to the rifle that shot it!)
Doing nooooooothing in the mountains (except read and pee for a whole day!)
Being the partial consumer of three of the four pans of blueberry crumble that Gustav and Jonathan made with the ridiculous numbers of wild blueberries that grew everywhere!
Mucking our way through the swam
Learning a Swedish song with profound and deeply challenging lyrics (Bagar Begntsson ar dod, han har brant sig pa brod, han har sjalv bakat in sig i en limpa. Han har kampat somen man med en flaskkorv i hand, och en gonmalad potta pa skaln.)
And the loads of reflection and prayer that went on as well.

Then I flew back to London and like the jet-setter I am, the next morning drove to Cologne Germany with my friend Matt for our friend Lisa's wedding. He and I had many adventures on our European tour...most of which were probably funny if you were there, but would bore you all to read about. We discovered that we are quite good at navigating ourselves home from random villages at 2:00 in the morning and that the policy of "just drive until we find a sign for any main road" generally works quite well. The people of Cologne were very lovely and there wasn't a time when we were pulled to the side of the road with our maps out that people didn't offer to help! We stopped at the Pachendale War Museum, at the Tyne Cot Commonwealth War Cemetary and at Ypres on the way home (thought we might as well end up happy weekend away on a positive note!) Actually, the war bits were very interesting and very humbling too. It's hard to imagine...but maybe not so hard...



The yard of our cabin in the woods


The boys...


Patrik and his guitar...


The double rainbow connection...

Leaving your gate open in the mountains...


In Belgium, it would seem it is law to wash your hands...


Friends Reunited!


Candian graves at Tyne Cot Cemetary


The successful European explorers on the (very windy) ferry back to the UK

Biggleswade, Cambridge and Wonderbread

Dantastic and I took a bit of a road trip on the weekend. We realised that it's hard to find a road out of Biggleswade (but came up with an awesome idea reality spoof show called something like "You can't leave Bigglewade) but eventually made it to Cambridge and found the best pub - or at least it made the best Steak and Ale pie I've ever had (and he reported that his...whatever he had was good too). It was called the Pickeral Inn and it's on Magdalene St. Good prices, good food. Highly recommended. I then proceeded to pick up a CD called Strange Country Music...it was a compilation of strange country music. Very good - very amusing...

I also realised yesterday that England doesn't seem to have a Wonderbread equivalent, and I think that's a bit sad. I miss wonderbread (although I don't know if I ever ate it..). Bonus points if you can finish the song..."great green globs of greasy, grimey gopher guts..."

Wlidlife Sightings!

Lisa and I took a great trip to Bath (via almost every village in Wiltshire) on the weekend (more photos to follow later). On the way to Bath I saw my first wild hedgehog and badger! Unfortunately they were dead on the road, but one must start somewhere, right?

In the spirit of Hedgehog sightings, Lisa sent me this link today...

http://www.loosetooth.com/Numo/numo.php3

I think hedgehogs should maybe stay in the wild...clearly, captivity has driven this one mad...

I...so...badly...want..one...

http://www.bordercollietrustgb.org.uk/

My Viking Name

I shamelessly copied this link from Ciaran's blog...

http://www.thequarter.org/Media/VikingName.php

Here's mine (I'm a bit freaked out about the last name - they had no way of knowing what my last name actually is!!!):

Jódís Sheeptipper
(Well, actually, that wouldn't really be your name -- since you're female, your name would be something like "Jódís Björnsdottir". But this is the twenty-first century, and you want to be known for who you are, not for who your father was, right? Right.)

Your Viking Personality: The tougher Vikings might let you on the boat, but generally only when they need ballast. Unlike most Vikings, you don't have a quick temper; you tend to think about your actions before you undertake them. Sometimes you think too long. You might be able to hold your own on the battlefield, but you're no "berserker".

A long sea voyage aboard a Viking longboat would be difficult for you, but you might be able to manage it. Other Vikings would consider you "one of the guys" if you were a guy. (But even though you're a woman, they still think you're all right.)

People who've known you for a while don't always trust your word. Other Vikings would be calling you "tree-hugging hippie peacenik" if the phrase had been invented.

And on this note, my Swedish learning is going slowly and steadily...I have a month before I have to put it to the test...I know how to say "I haven't been to Sweden before" but that would be a lie because I have been, and since I don't want to end up in a Swedish jail, I better learn a new sentence!

Along the Lines of Comfort Goop...

I sent this email to my sister, because if I were in Toronto I'd want to spend the evening with her..

Today's a beautiful day here, and it's one of those days where I feel like if it's as nice in Toronto as it is here (you know, sunny and warm, but not too warm) I'd call you this evening and say "let's meet up tonight" and of course you'd be free (as one is always wont to be in imagined scenarios) and we'd go to Baskin Robbins (I imagine the one at Christie Station even though I know you don't live there anymore and it would be a trek, but that doesn't matter in these imaginings either!) and get something chocolatey. Yum yum!

I get comments sometimes about how it seems like I have an adventure each time I leave the house and "how will you ever be able to come back" etc While that sometimes seems to be the case, please rest assured that there are times when I feel like I'd trade almost the whole two years of adventures for two hours of coffee, or ice cream, or a Sunday lunch with people at home. They do say, Gentle Reader, that home is where the heart is, and lots of me is still back in Canada.

Comfort Goop

I have long since forgotten the name of this recipe (if it, indeed, ever had one to begin with), but tonight I'm going to make mom's comfort goop for dinner tonight...and I need to share how to make it with everyone else! It sounds gross, but trust me - it's brilliant (and I look forward to converting my friend who's coming around for dinner tonight!)

1. Brown some ground (mince - for the UK audience) beef with onions
2. Add one package of made Kraft Dinner (available at the Canadian import store, or from me in a limited supply, and for a price, for the UK audience)
3. Add one un-made can of Campbell's tomato soup

Stir it all up, and serve with ketchup, salad and a nice glass of red wine (except mommy didn't serve it to us with wine when we were little).

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmm....comfort goop...

How to Save £20 at IKEA

Last night the flatmate and I, as part of our "Flat Rejuvenation" project, spontaneously went to IKEA to get a bookshelf...as we were leaving we decided to check out the "as is" section, and came across exactly the shelf we were about to buy, but already assembled (with no obvious flaws), and £20 cheaper! From that point it was only a matter of fitting a very long shelf into my very short Amica and trecking it home on the North Circular. The Flatmate's father was wondering if we got a £20 ticket, but no, we made it safe and sound!

How the Flatmates got their house back

After yet another exhausting and depressing houseviewing session, the Flatmates decided that perhaps the grass isn't always greener, and called the Landlord to ask if they could "undo" their notice "of course," said the landlord, so it is at the Parish Lockup that the flatmates will remain. A few minor changes will be made, and they will put a bit more effort into its appearance, but they are very happy to be settled into a place they love as their home where the lounge is filled with sunshine and they can watch the Mill Hill East tube line cross the viaduct every ten minutes in each direction...

And for my next Trick...

Sass emailed me and said that she, Weiller, Lami and Chandra are going on a canoe trip, and I felt rather homesick. Since going up to the Lake District, I've been aching to get a canoe and since the Flatmate and I want to find a place with a garden, I thought "hmmmm...now I'll have storage space for one" so I went on ebay to investigate. The ones that weren't inflatable or actually kayaks (why can't British people get that right?) were rather quite expensive, but then I saw this...a diy canoe kit for only £10! A project for when daddy comes to visit this Autumn (you didn't really want to leave my backyard - did you Dad? My wonderful daddy has build a couple beautiful cedar strip canoes from scratch, and has wonderfully restored and repainted an old canvas war canoe, if I may be so bold as to brag about my dad's wonderful talents!)

Well, I'll give it a think. As for now, I'm expecting my mail-order teach yourself Swedish course to arrive any day now...

Life Admin...

Dear Readers,

There are so many times each week when I think of something and think "Oh, I'd like to blog that", but right now, my life is being taken up by what my colleague calls "Life Admin" - finding a new place to live with the Flatmate, sorting through my belongings to get rid of the things I don't want to take, and well...something that I have learned from reading blogging articles one shouldn't discuss online, having lots of rehearsals for concerts, etc, etc. Work is still so busy that on my lunch hours these days I want to escape instead of doing this...but when I have internet etc at home (which won't be so long now) I'll be here much more.

In the meantime, I wrote my first song a few weeks ago. It was a beautiful Sunday afternoon and I was waiting to listen to the England game on the radio... I'll probably never get a Grammy for it, but it suited the time...I have recently got a second hand classical guitar, named Alpha (for those of you who know Winston, no worries...he's well and in storage in Canada - he didn't make the flight over). Anyways, it goes a little something like this:

Me and my alpha guitar
Haven't got very far
because I'm sitting in the sunshine on the sofa.
I've got a million and one things do do
but the sky is breezy and blue
and I'm enjoying feeling like a loafa

England's playing today
And what else can I say
the window boxes on my sill are really pretty!!!!

Me and my alpha guitar
haven’t got very far
because I’m sitting in the sunshine on my sofa.

Tonight I'm making a roast
and I don't mean to boast
but I've been told my roasts are rather yummy!

Me and my alpha guitar
Haven’t got very far
Because I’m sitting in the sunshine on my sofa

I spoke with Patrik on the phone,
later I'll call him at home
and then I'll have a chance to practice my Swedish!

Me and my alpha guitar
Haven’t got very far
Because I’m sitting in the sunshine on my sofa!

Yeahhh...as I said, no grammies yet, but it's a start!

Why the Scots need more things to amuse themselves

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/highlands_and_islands/5105946.stm

I wonder how much it would cost to take out a policy incase the Loch Ness Monster shows up as a stray on my doorstep...

Sounds like home to me...

Last night at rehearsal we had our soloists come along and rehearse a new piece with us. They have a duet to the words of DH Lawrence's Piano. The music and the words are stunning and by the end I was fighting back a flood of tears (note: it's the movement preceding Arise My Love - see Sunday, February 5, 2006's post for my thoughts about that one). Anyways, something about it made me feel rather homesick (not quite sure what though, because although we have a large black piano, winter and my mother does have rather little feet, our family sing-songs usually involved my dad and the guitar instead of my mom and the piano...). At any rate...just wanted to share the words with you (and if this gives you the incentive to come to the concert - I think we may be sold out - sorry!)


Softly, in the dusk, a woman is singing to me;
Taking me back down the vista of years, till I see
A child sitting under the piano, in the boom of the tingling strings
And pressing the small, poised feet of a mother who smiles as she sings.

In spite of myself, the insidious mastery of song
Betrays me back, till the heart of me weeps to belong
To the old Sunday evenings at home, with winter outside
And hymns in the cosy parlour, the tinkling piano our guide.

So now it is vain for the singer to burst into clamour
With the great black piano appassionato.
The glamour of childish days is upon me, my manhood is cast
Down in the flood of remembrance, I weep like a child for the past.

Mug Shot

I glanced at my mugs on my desk the other day and thought "mug shot" and it made me giggle (oh, we of easy amusement)

It was to be the first in my "photo of the day" series on flickr, but then my camera batteries died, so I am going to restart the series tomorrow...

Ride 'em ....whoever...

In one of those conversations that I have since forgotten how it got started, Lisa and I started inventing different types of "rodeos" for different segments of the general population (I do remember me saying something about rodeos, and she said "do they still have those?" and I said "Yes" and after a moment's reflection she said "if the person smells, does it then become a BO-deo?" and ti went from there...here's our list (thus far...it seems to be ever expanding)

A rodeo for drug users - ODeo
A rodeo for amphibians - Toadeo
...for prostitutes (or mall Santas, or amusingly, both...) - Hodeo
...for hobbits - frodeo
...for fashion victims - vogue-eo
...for farmers - rod-e-i-e-i-o
...for Romans - tog-eo
...for Inuit - snowdeo
...for people who feel sorry for themselves - woedeo
...for teletubbies - podeo
...for deceased authors - wrote-eo
...for Pillsbury dough boys - poke-eo

I think the list could go on...but it's addictive and I'd better stop...

Spam!

An example of a spam email I had got at work that clearly went through one too many online translations...

"tried ! gurgle but solvate but presuming try defendant on emery but acquit be psychometry ! convalesce the denominate try diffeomorphic try diaphragm not dilogarithm or hawthorn the khartoum not minibike the rooftree see central but stucco be savage on alan a chinese ! civet not drink in cult it create and emissary on emasculate but cern see ashen be circumference and pyrolysis see nostradamus , concise notKeine email hier , monetarist not backstop andit's coherent and sequoia seemay gentile it excretory ,or stud on ludwig on"

I'm convinced!

(PS Don't worry - I didn't actually open it - I copied it from my viewing pane)

Donald, Where's Your Troosers?

Well, it's been two weeks since we left, but the wild roadtrip to Scotland, England and Wales in a weekend was FANTASTIC! Bumping along Britain's highways often listening to what somehow became our official theme song "Donald Where's Your Troosers" we explored 1129 miles of some of the best scenes and highways that Britain has to offer! The highlights included Drew declaring that "Cheshire smells like poo" (because as we passed the "welcome to Chesire sigh, we were accosted by the smell of manure, that really didn't leave us until we left Chesire), happening upon Hadrian's Wall (although we never quite figured out how a three foot high wall was going to keep the Scots out of England - ha ha), watching the sunrise on Loch Lomond (after getting over the disapointment of discovering that Loch is actually just a fancy-dancy word for Lake), the beautiful town of Luss (where everything is perfectly in place and the man who impatiently poured we whisky amatueurs our whisky in the pub was also the man who cooked our breakfast at the village store the next day. He was probably also the postman, school teacher, police officer and doctor), the amusement of perfecting our Scottish accents all the way to Scotland (only to realise that we always ended in a hybrid of Hungarian and Indian. Eventually we decided that adding "Auch" before everything we said worked well enough to keep us happy, and thus we carried on with our bad accents with a bit of "auch" for authenticity's sake), the shoddily shorn Scottish Sheep (picture to follow), discovering the secret sect of the Ninja Methodists (and listening as Dave and Drew worked out the finer points of their theology, including how one should fight back when fighting a Ninja Methodist), driving through random one-car lanes in Wales looking for a road...any road..., the unforgettable moment of popping over the crest of Snowdon just before the final push to the summit, and the hilarious frustration Drew and I felt of being stuck for an hour in a North Welsh traffic jam on a random country road (who knew they had enough cars).

Aaaaand blogger's being stupid and won't let me post them, so I'll have to put some of them on Flickr...

My Flickr Site...

Hi,

If you will turn your eyes to the left, you'll notice I have posted a link to my flickr site. Like this one, it is very much a work-in-progress.

I just wanted to say, please don't be offended if you don't see yourself up there yet. I have made an arbitrary rule that I'm not allowed to go through and post old "back dated" (as it were) photos. The ones I am posting (except for the one of John in the signs section), are ones that are already on my camera, or haven't been taken yet (did that make sense?). I'm also going to try to change my headings. I don't like the "people that matter" because I don't want people who aren't there yet to think they don't matter (or people who are to get swelled heads!)